Tonight was the final lifting session before Saturday’s competition. I did a fairly easy 3 x 3 squat @ 72.5kg (80%) and 3 x 3 bench with pauses @ 40kg (80%)

I weighed myself on the gym scales and – horror of horrors – I was 2.4kg over weight. Then I took off my knee sleeves & shoes, and was exactly 1kg over. Stupid shoes.

I’ve been feeling miserable about making weight tonight, and that’s translated into feeling miserable about always coming last when I compete and why do I bother powerlifting at all?

It sounds like the most horrible thing to say ever, but I think I enjoyed lifting more when I was the only lady who regularly attended the gym; now that we have loads of other ladies, I compare myself to them and feel utterly rotten about how mediocre I am. Don’t get me wrong – I love that we have loads of ladies, because I want to see more women lifting. I just don’t know how to handle the jealousy I feel 😦 And I can’t work any harder to catch up with them, because 1) I work hard already; and 2) they’re in their Newbie Gains phases, and I’m very, very much past that.

Maybe I need to haul myself off to the sports psych again.


3 thoughts on “

  1. jh

    What exactly is a sports psych?

    I feel like I can relate to you a lot in that aspect; not fully celebrating my own progress and success because I get too stuck in the world of others.. I was just venting yesterday to someone about how I learned a particular Crossfit skill 8 months ago (kipping pull-ups); and even now, I still can’t link multiple ones together. By now, I should be so much further along than I am (says who?!). Ugh. 🙂

    I think it’s awesome you lift and I don’t care what your numbers are.. I love seeing your posts anyway 😉

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